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How to avoid 'romance scams' this Valentine's Day

The F.B.I. says more than 24,000 in the U.S. fell victim to "romance scams" last year, costing them millions. Here are the red flags to look for.

NORFOLK, Va. — It’s February, so romance is in the air, but if you are looking for love, beware.

The F.B.I. says more than 24,000 in the U.S. fell victim to "romance scams" last year, costing them millions.

As people are making their Valentine’s Day plans and spending time with their partner, there are some "relationships" that could use a second look, especially online.

"I felt a real soul connection with him right away. We sang to each other. We prayed with each other. We’d talk about what happened at church on Sunday," one victim anonymously told the FBI.

That victim said she was scammed out of $2 million by someone pretending to be romantically interested in her.

"He was trying to finish up a job in California, and he needed some money to help finish that job up. And so I sent him [money]. I thought about it long and hard. I prayed about it. And I’ve always been a very giving person. And I figured if I had money in the account, that I could send him some money. And he promised to have it back within 24 to 48 hours."

But she never saw that money again.

"But one thing kept happening after another. He’d need more money because he was coming in over budget. Things didn’t get done on time. He needed a lawyer," she said. "That is where this is all so pitiful is because, if he’s a scammer, I’ve been so brainwashed. And I’ve lost everything. It’s all I had. It’s any inheritance that I could have passed on to my daughter."

Just last year, 24,000 Americans reported being scammed out of a total of $1 billion.

"Romance scams" happen when a criminal adopts a fake online identity to gain a victim’s affection and trust. The scammer then uses the illusion of a romantic or close relationship to manipulate and steal from the victim.

FBI Norfolk Supervisory Special Agent Scott Zmudzinski said older adults are the most susceptible.

"It’s a different generation. They are very trusting people and they have hearts that are very vulnerable to these kinds of scams," he said.

So, what are the warning signs?

Agent Zmudzinski said to look out for the following red flags:

  • You've never met the person
  • The video is blurry every time you video chat
  • There is always an excuse why they can't meet in person
  • Most importantly, if they ask for money

If you do come to terms with the fact that your online relationship isn't real, he said there are steps you should take immediately.

"Stop all communication with the actor, right. Stop emailing. Stop texting. Stop answering phone calls. And block those numbers. And you can do that, that’s very easy. What happens is if you don’t, the actor gets frustrated, and then starts making threats. Threats to individuals personally, threats to family members, about things they could do to extort them."

The FBI said the golden rule for anyone you meet online: be cautious.

The criminals who carry out romance scams are experts at what they do and will seem genuine, caring and believable.

If you are the one doing the scamming, you could face 20 to 30 years in prison.

Anyone who has discovered they’ve become a victim of one of these scams needs to contact IC3.gov and report that to the FBI. That way, the agency can collect the information and try to connect it with any bigger cases that exist within the U.S.

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